… IN THAT DAY

Isaiah 4:1 AMP:

AND IN that day, seven women shall take hold of one man, saying: “we will eat our own bread and provide our own apparel; only let us be called by your name to take away our reproach of being unmarried.”

Like most folks, I do have a bible and like few believers, I try to study mine sometimes. A few days ago, I sprang it open to study and this verse hit me hard in the face. I was stunned, yet assumed God was teasing his lovely son: trust me I was feeling it. For me, receiving good-hearted banters from the Almighty God very early in the morning is priceless. Yeah, I was looking for something else, that verse was something else. In awe, I neatly arranged my tatty Bible; end of study.

Pictures began to form in the canvas of my lofty mind. Frankly, I am yet to do an in-depth study on this part of the scriptures, but I love to assume it was a prophetic declaration about the end time; what is to come. If my assumption is right, then I really love to be around and to be a part of this lucky generation before I cross to the other side of eternity where there is no such thing as timing and the sun doesn’t rise nor set.

I am in my twenties, so, there is no better moment for the fulfilment of this prophesy in time than now when seven ‘smokin’ hot’ ladies who would shift mountains just to be called by my name, and for once, my surname would be more valuable than anything else.

The situation of the country has made things difficult for young men; for it is easier for a Carmel to pass through the eye of the needle than a young man to peacefully maintain a damsel. They are looking for men who would scribe poems for them all night, take them to the movies, spend all your day on phone with her, listen gleefully and religiously to her gist even if they are boring, take her to the cinema every weekend, love her just as she is irrespective of her huge sack of flaws and also be willing to die for her as if Jesus’s death was a rehearsal. Many men keep smiling even as they creak under the weight of the self-inflicted burden. They fear losing their investment to who seems to be a bigger investor, as such, they keep investing. Guys! I have got good news for you all: your time is here. Keep holding on! God keeps his word.

As a teenager, I admired uncle Murz who had four women under his palatial roof. He ate from the pot of 4 talented women, he decided who followed him for which function and occasion, he decided whose bedsheets would be stained and rumpled for the night and sometimes he determined who sashayed into his ‘chandeliered Holy of holies (he probably would have tried stuffs like threesome and other kind of ‘somes’). He woke up with beautiful women kneeling before him, chanting his barbs. Uncle was a god in his own Kingdom until his death. The fulfilment of this prophetic declaration is my only hope of meeting up; AND IN THAT DAY…

IN THAT DAY… monogamy would be tagged as wickedness and selfishness and some churches will become a bit liberal about the issues. Some might say you can marry only one but allow six others to be called by your name (that sounds more like a business deal to me). I also discovered this will bring a lasting solution to some societal issues. For example:

BRIDAL RITE MADNESS : I love and respect cultures, however, some greedy minds have capitalized on that to defraud young men who are launching into another phase of their lives. Why should you spend thousands of dollars before a family will release their daughter to you in marriage? She is not for sale! Thank God! It is but for a short period.

AND IN THAT DAY, bridal price would be extinct in some tribes. In a few other ‘stubborn tribes’ it would be reduced to things like, a seed of mango, a tuber of yam and in royal families like mine, they might ask for additional bottle of Coca-Cola or dry gin (they would be afraid to ask for both, trust me). Then we would be talking more about GROOM PRICE. Hallelujah!!!

UNWISE INVESTMENT :There is this popular belief that ladies are rapacious: “If you are not loaded with wads of cash, do not go near blah blah blah”, they warned. Trust me, I haven’t had such experiences so that claim is often strange to me. However, I have some acquaintances who have this ‘demonic’ mindset that says “Women are born to receive while men are born to work and sweat, then pour his treasure into the seductive bottomless pit.”

BUT IN THAT DAY, those who sowed in tears, would reap in joy. Men won’t follow anyone to cinemas, they won’t demand pizza or phones, they will ask for cars, ladies will fund businesses, with smiles and fulfilment because as the saying goes, “Desperate people do desperate things”. Who dares ask for a dime when she would need to fill a form to talk to the boss?

Like the children of Issachar, I understand the times and I am certain that this is a season to monetize my Name. To be called by my name, you will need to subscribe monthly or annually depending on my lawyer’s advice. This season would prove to us that ladies can live together in peace and harmony even under the same roof; “Behold, how beautiful it is for ladies to dwell together in unity.!” Behind every successful man, there is a great woman so imagine when you have 7 women behind you, all working assiduously to make sure you fulfill purpose.

GENDER EQUALITY : In as much as I love the gospel of gender equality, this gospel has an expiring date and don’t take my word for it, the bible clearly infers that. Are we truly equal? Yes, but only in God’s sight. I have noticed that God gave men ability to love more than one woman per time, maybe it’s for a time such as this. I have also wondered why society even churches mount pressure on ladies of marriageable age who are productively pursuing their dreams and visions in life, maybe they are afraid and worried on their behalf.

Have fun guys!

46 thoughts on “… IN THAT DAY”

  1. Sometimes, Tunji can be the calmest and the silent in the room, other times he can be the loudest…. Both ways he must be the one of the funniest and always in the class of the most creative.
    He makes Christianity seems fun and easy. I hate some things in this piece but I love the way you delivered it with humor and creativity.
    God bless you richly

  2. I applaud the writer in you
    The skillful,yet humorous style of delivering your point.
    Your choice of words are simple and easy to relate with.
    Reading your posts is always an interesting ordeal. You sure know how to get your reader attentive till the end.
    I do not agree with some of the notions in your post but I say Great job once again.

  3. I applaud the writer in you
    The skillful,yet humorous style of delivering your point.
    Your choice of words are simple and easy to relate with.
    Reading your posts is always an interesting ordeal. You sure know how to get your reader attentive till the end.
    I do not agree with some of the notions in your post but I say Great job once again.

  4. This got me laughing. You expressed your wish and thoughts in the name of a scriptural verse. Issokay. I’ve really been away for a while and this is the first of your write ups I’m reading after a long while.
    I applaud your sense of humour. Nice job bro.

  5. This got me laughing. You expressed your wish and thoughts in the name of a scriptural verse. Issokay. I’ve really been away for a while and this is the first of your write ups I’m reading after a long while.
    I applaud your sense of humour. Nice job bro.

  6. As a professional writer, I respect your writing skills and knack for excellence delivery… Your sense of humor is up there with the best. However, as a lady I think you are a sexist. Asshole is who you are!

    1. Thanks so much for reading and for dropping your thoughts… Your accolades is spot on and I feel so special.
      I am sure the ‘asshole’ was a mistake because that would contradict your previous encomium(according to Merriam Webster dictionary).
      Rockdweller is who I am.
      Gracias Muchas Amigos

  7. As a professional writer, I respect your writing skills and knack for excellence delivery… Your sense of humor is up there with the best. However, as a lady I think you are a sexist. Asshole is who you are!

    1. Thanks so much for reading and for dropping your thoughts… Your accolades is spot on and I feel so special.
      I am sure the ‘asshole’ was a mistake because that would contradict your previous encomium(according to Merriam Webster dictionary).
      Rockdweller is who I am.
      Gracias Muchas Amigos

  8. I am sure you must be a very bold person… As I read this I can feel and connect with your personality. Keep doing more of this. Much love and respect for you Rockdweller.

  9. I am sure you must be a very bold person… As I read this I can feel and connect with your personality. Keep doing more of this. Much love and respect for you Rockdweller.

  10. OLATUNJI ROCKDWELLER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hmmmm nothing could be more blunt yet so full of knowledge like this beautiful piece I just appeased my heart with by reading…..

  11. OLATUNJI ROCKDWELLER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hmmmm nothing could be more blunt yet so full of knowledge like this beautiful piece I just appeased my heart with by reading…..

  12. Swordsmith well done ooo. Nice write up but wait for that day in your dreams see money making machine in action. Mtcheeeeeew

  13. Swordsmith well done ooo. Nice write up but wait for that day in your dreams see money making machine in action. Mtcheeeeeew

  14. I will right away grab your rss as I can’t find your e-mail subscription hyperlink or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Kindly allow me recognise so that I may just subscribe. Thanks.

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