Inability of the Horse to say NO cost its life during war – Yoruba Proverb
I rate ‘NO’ as the most unique word in English language dictionary. Even though, it is just two letter, it seems like the most difficult word to spill out. To some its strikes like M.O.A.B (mother of all bombs) and to others it’s the rod of rejection so it’s understandable why it’s antisocial in nature. I have observed that we tend to be more careful with the word as we evacuate childhood for adulthood. It’s one of those diseases that maturity has infected us with; we spend the rest of our lives wrestling. Amazingly, ‘NO’ is a complete sentence. It requires no explanation…NO is just NO!
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Mortality and selfishness are inseparable. In fact, every human being is selfish even though we manifest in different level and shades. Daily, we are surrounded by families, friends, bosses, spouses and companions who constantly bombard us with plethora of demands yet they all expect nothing but favourable response even when it’s draining, uncomfortable even impossible sometimes.
I perfectly understand that saying No to some ‘entrenched power blocks’ (parents, bosses etc.) can be practically inconceivable. Everybody has someone (people) he either love so much or fears too much to hurt or disappoint. However, it’s impossible to attain greatness without developing a spine and start saying ‘no’ even to these ‘strongholds’ or authority figure. You can’t please everyone and still breathe.
This two-lettered word is potent enough to grate on weak nerves and amplify insecurities in both the listener and speaker like no other. Sometimes, ‘No’ must be said with aching heart and buckling knees. It’s often very uncomfortable . Sometimes, saying ‘NO’ makes you feel miserable but say it anyway.
Successful people are goal oriented folks with clear standard, core values and goals. They see anything outside the scope of their goals and vision as distraction. So, it’s always easier for them to develop balls to yell ‘Hell NO!’ Minding less about whose ox is gored.
In my opinion, the greatest sin a man can commit against his soul is…Doing what his mind doesn’t agree with (saying ‘yes’ to what you soul is saying ‘No’ to). Saying ‘NO’ is sweatier when you are caged in your own insecurities, fears and pride. Ernest Agyemang Yeboah puts it this way: it takes true courage and real humility to say NO or YES!
Your conscience is the tool by which God speaks to you, bowing to pressure and doing what is against your conscience and values makes you a huge liability both to yourself and generation. Little minds are men without solid convictions, Heroes are folks who are loyal to their inner most treasure.
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You don’t need anybody’s approval to be yourself and do the right thing. You don’t need cheerleaders in your life. The only people who are permitted in your life are folks who respect your conviction. Secured folks who do not interpret your ‘NO’ for rejection? Real friends understand that ‘No’ is as important as ‘Yes’.
Ephesians 6:6 KJV
Not with eye service, as men pleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart;
New International Version (Gal 1:10)
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
Finally, constantly choose to be honourable by sticking to your values and conviction. Good deeds performs against your inner voice is not recorded in heaven’s account. Decide to say ‘NO’ even when you feel awkward, insist to follow your heart even when you feel ridiculous. Stay on the right path even when it means staying alone.
Remember, saying ‘No’ without guilt when necessary may cost you some good opportunities, it may even make you lose your good friends, however, saying no will usher you into greatness and makes you to be someone’s opportunity and it will help you receive the best of friends.
Just do it!